Post
by danwho » November 20th, 2012, 9:54 am
I hope this post doesn't get too long. I am a fairly recent addition to the team. I don't know all of the history. One of the things that really attracted me to this team was all of the "Overcoming Disabilities" members. I found myself inspired by them. And watching a lot of them leave now helps me to see a little more clearly why I was looking for that inspiration. I've had glaucoma since I was 30. I'm 58 now. At the time I was diagnosed, I already had a substantial amount of visual field loss in my right eye. My left eye, while affected, still seemed in pretty good shape. At that time, I started to prepare myself for the idea that I might go blind by the time I was older, and would I want to carry on after that. At 30, it seemed I didn't have to worry about this too much right away. And doctors have been great, and I was beginning to think that maybe none of my fears would be realized. Last year, I had a setback because I had a detached retina in my left eye (my good eye). The surgery was successful - my retina is back in place. But my central vision in my left eye is off. I seem to have some distortion in my left eye in the center - which apparently is due to some little "wrinkles" that formed in the retina even though it is back in place. The distortion is enough to interfere with my ability to do my job. But the brain is an amazing thing, and quite effectively combines the central vision I still have from my right eye (bad eye) with the visual field from my left eye. It's not seamless. I am aware of what's going on. And it's only natural for all the old fears to come back now. Before the detached retina, I started to feel comfortable that I would keep vision in my left eye, and my right eye would just do what it could as long as it could, and give me some binocular vision. But now, I'm in the position of actually depending upon my right eye for my central vision. And I don't think my right eye is really dependable.
Anyway, that's some of my story. I know it's not the same as dealing with and actually "overcoming" a disability. At least not yet. But I did find myself encouraged and inspired by the members of the Overcoming Disabilities portion of the LUNA-TICS. And now I see that I was really looking for that - as a way of preparing myself for whatever happens next. So, for me, I have to say I got something from seeing you out there. And I miss seeing you.
Whatever will be will be. It would be nice to understand, but it's fine if I don't too. Life goes on. And I plan to row on - but I think I'll take a break today.